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It happened to me on Highway 18 at 50 miles per hour. I was in my work truck driving to my next appointment when a big wasp appeared from out of nowhere and started going berserk inside the cab. After years of working with wasps I knew it wouldn’t bother me, so I calmly rolled down a window and let it fly to freedom. As I thought over the minor event, I realized that my job as a pest professional has given me many subtle superpowers. Here’s more:

>> I can don a bulky bee suit, climb a ladder thirty feet up to an eave and exterminate a swarming wasp nest. (Another superpower: convincing one of my workers that doing it for me will be super fun.)

>> I can fearlessly squirm through crawl spaces teeming with black widows, rats, and the occasional mother raccoon protecting her young. (Mama, don’t let your babies grow up to be roadkill.)

>> I can tell if the filter on my handheld sprayer is clogged just from the shape of the spray pattern. (Try to control your excitement, ladies.)

>> I can get sprayed by a skunk and keep on working like nothing happened. (But only after cussing up a storm.)

>> I can put a stepladder in a bedroom closet, contort myself around the Christmas decorations on the shelf while simultaneously pulling myself up into the attic… all without breaking a single Santa figurine. (Reality check: I broke a few glass ball ornaments learning that skill.)

>> I can see an adorable flying squirrel in an attic without once breaking professional concentration by exclaiming: “Ahh, he’s so cute!” (“That’s the greatest superpower ever!” says a guy with unicorn posters on his bedroom walls.)

>> I can rescue a super cute baby raccoon trapped in a wall void. (For the record, ladies, I do not have unicorn posters on my bedroom walls… kitten posters rule!) 

So, that’s my list. When you need a superhero, I’m only a phone call away. Have a super cute week, everyone!

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