“Help Mike, it’s crawling up the screen. Quick, come get it!” My secretary Erika was eyeballing something scary and calling me for help.
I ran into the main office and spotted the creature in question. It was climbing our screen door in broad daylight—at a pest control business of all places. Wow. You just don’t see that. Bold little cuss, wasn’t it?
Oh, that’s right, you’re still waiting to hear what the bloodthirsty predator was. Sorry, well, it was… wait a second, I’m about to sneeze… that summer pollen is driving me crazy… hold on… nope, false alarm. The critter in question was a mouse.
Here I go again. I’m writing about mice again. But I can’t help myself because it’s summer and mice are breeding like Mississippi River mosquitoes. When those furry marauders breach your private island, call us without delay. At Home Defenders, we have proven solutions to mouse pollutions.
I bolted outside my office and the rogue mouse ran straight up a stucco wall, stopped in a corner, and hung there like Mother Nature’s very own Spiderman. In over thirty years of pest management, I’ve never seen a mouse do that. I quickly did what any self-respecting pest professional would do: I whipped out my phone and filmed the scene. Then I shooed the critter away. He belongs outside and he’ll stay outside because our office is fortified against rodent entry.
I strode back inside expecting a heroes’ welcome, but Erika and the other secretaries were absorbed in paperwork and had forgotten the whole incident. Oh well, we mice-shooing superheroes don’t really expect thanks; we’re just happy to have saved the day.
Hold on! Is that a big, hairy spider on the venetian blind, poised to attack? Stand clear, ladies, I’ll battle the beast!
Oh, wait… it’s just a harmless piece of fuzzy lint.